Ask Kel
Back by popular demand | kelweaver.com

What is this?

If you've been friends with me long enough to remember the original kelweaver.com, then you probably remember Ask Kel quite fondly. If that's the case, simply skip this introduction and scroll down to the question input form at the bottom of the page.

For those of you new to the scene, Ask Kel was the most popular part of kelweaver.com simply because it was the most interactive. The premise is quite simple: you fill out a form below in which you ask a question that you must simply have answered. I come along - usually pretty promptly - and answer the question asked. Fun times are had by all.


The Questions

What is the word for that little springy thing with the rubber cap at the bottom of the back of a door that keeps the door from banging into the wall? You know, and it makes a really fun noise for a few seconds when you flick it?
- John asked on Thu, 13 Sep 2007

I've always heard them referred to as door stops. Wikipedia has an entry about them, though it doesn't mention the spring kind specifically. But since I can seemingly find a paper about the fun sound, and it calls the device a "spring door stop", I would guess I am correct in this being at least one of its names.


Would I see a big difference in internet download speeds or home-network transfer speeds with a 10/100 Mbps ethernet card vs. a 10/100/1000 ethernet card? Why or why not?
- John asked on Thu, 16 Aug 2007

Because you are asking about two different applications, I will need to address both separately:

Home Transfer Speeds:
Yes, in theory. If you have a gigabit connection between two computers, sending a large file will take less time then it would over a 10/100 Mbps connection. However, to really warrant this, you would need to be sending huge files across the network all the time. If you're gonna just be copying mp3's from one computer to another, the slower connection will get it done in a just as reasonable amount of time. That's not to say I think you shouldn't get a gigabit card - they're cheap enough, already. I'm just saying you're probably not doing what would be needed to really notice the advantage a gigabit card gives you.

Internet Download Speeds:
No. The fastest DSL downstream connection at this time is 10 Mbps, which is it's theoretical upper bound. In fact, you'll probably be downloading a little slower than that. A 10/100 Mbps card will handle this just fine; your bottle neck will be the DSL connection and not your network card.


What would you say are the main differences between computer science and computer engineering?
- John asked on Fri, 20 Jul 2007

Lots of physics and electrical engineering.

More specifically, you can think of the main difference between Computer Science and Computer Engineering as being the same difference between software and hardware. Computer Science studies software complexity, intractability, and several other elements that deal with how a program is written. Computer Engineering deals with processor design, circuits, and that sort of thing. There is some overlap between the two - for instance, every Computer Science program I've seen requires a Computer Architecture class, and most Computer Engineering students typically take at least an intro programming course. But primarily, Computer Engineering focuses on the hardware of computers, while Computer Science focuses on the software.


Why is this so funny?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4Wm4DXkcj0
- Luca asked on Tue, 17 Jul 2007

Because you have no soul. And also because the smaller of the two guys has to slither on the floor until he finds something to grab onto to hoist himself up to stand.


Be completely honest, Kelly: How long did you spend trying to come up with a solution to the problem posed by the customer in this xkcd comic (http://xkcd.com/c287.html)? (I actually want to know if there's an answer, because I spent 2 minutes on it and gave u--I mean, I had more important lab work to do, yeah...)
- John asked on Sat, 14 Jul 2007

The problem is small enough that you can just brute force it. If you have a C compiler handy, just throw this into it real quick:

#include <stdio.h>
#include <math.h>

int main(int argc, char** argv)
{
int a, b, c, d, e, f;

for (a = 0; a < 10; a++)
for (b = 0; b < 10; b++)
for (c = 0; c < 10; c++)
for (d = 0; d < 10; d++)
for (e = 0; e < 10; e++)
for (f = 0; f < 10; f++)
if ( fabs(a * 2.15 + b * 2.75 + c * 3.35 + d * 3.55 + e * 4.20 + f * 5.80 - 15.05) < 0.0000001)
printf("%d mixed fruits, %d french fries, %d side salads, %d hot wings, %d mozzarella sticks, and %d sampler plates are a solution\n", a, b, c, d, e, f);

return 0;
}


Kelly in Final Fantasy for the NES does I need to equip my Knight with the Opal shield or the Aegis shield? Also, what do you feel is a good name for the Black Mage/Wizard? And finally is the white mage a male or female?
- Austin asked on Wed, 4 Jul 2007

...

Auron's already dead! He was killed ten years earlier! Man, I just ruined a totally huge plot twist.


Orson Scott Card invented the concept of internet discussion forums and instant messaging in Ender's Game. Discuss.
- John asked on Fri, 29 Jun 2007

I think it would be more accurate to say he invented the concept of an MMO, but in all honesty all these things existed before he wrote Ender's Game.


After reading about all its awesome features, are you going to get the new iPhone?
- John asked on Wed, 27 Jun 2007

No.

And here's why: When my contract with Cingular/AT&T is up and I'm able to upgrade, they'll have the fourth or fifth generation iPhone which will be about twelve thousand times cooler than the current one. It'll probably even be clamshell. And it will be cheaper.

The iPhone is going to be amazing, and it's a step in the direction that I think we'll reach eventually where computing is no longer limited to monolithic machines sitting on desks, but rather is done with small pocket sized portable devices. But, if you can help it, you should never buy the first generation of something. Let the early adopters do that, and let them pay their $600 to discover all the design flaws and bugs.


Why did I register for kelweaver.com?
- Austin asked on Mon, 18 Jun 2007

Because I asked you to. Do you really need any other reason?


How do you win a Nobel Prize? And what categories do they have? Is "Potent Potables" one of them?
- Adam asked on Mon, 18 Jun 2007

You win a Nobel Prize by doing the following:




I don't know if "Potent Potables" is a category, but I'm pretty certain that "Foreign Fucks" is.


When is Petrie going to hurry up and cure cancer? I really want to be there when he gets his Nobel Prize for...um...Cancer Curation.
- Adam asked on Mon, 18 Jun 2007

The minute Petrie cures cancer, the government is going to kill him. You see, cancer is a government conspiracy! The Federal government invented cancer back in 1456 so they could eventually control our minds and our thoughts. There have actually been seven cures for the disease found, and each scientist died mysteriously. Don't go outside! They're reading your thoughts!

/tinfoil hat


Why is Kelly so fat and smelly?
- Adam asked on Mon, 18 Jun 2007

For much the same reason that everyone thinks you are gay.


Hey Kelly, I was wondering if you knew what the biggest planet in the world is?
- Adam asked on Mon, 18 Jun 2007

I'm pretty sure it's... wait for the dramatic pause... EARTH!


The theme of an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other shoulder telling a person what to do is so common and generic that it seems like it's been around forever. What was the first movie or TV show or whatever to use this device?
- John asked on Sun, 17 Jun 2007

I don't know, but in my opinion, the best use of this device is in The Emperor's New Groove. I've looked all over youtube to find the scene I'm talking about, but sadly I can't seem to find it. So, I'll just have to encourage everyone to go watch it instead.


Kelly you should write your web comic again. It was pretty funny and could be really good if you kept at it.
- John asked on Sat, 16 Jun 2007

This isn't a question.

My web comic was extremely time consuming. I would love nothing more than to do it again, but I certainly do not have the patience to learn how to properly use Photoshop to make a good quality comic. I might try to churn one out every once in a while, but I wouldn't hold my breath.


Why don't you come and visit?
- Austin asked on Wed, 6 Jun 2007

Austin, you live in Flinstone. In order for me to come visit you, first I must go back in time. And while I have spent most of my life looking for Dr. Emmett Brown, and his glorious DeLorean, alas I have yet to find either.

I am curious, however, how you are able to post to this site from the past...


It's a simple question Kelly, would ya eat the moon if it were made of ribs?
- Mike asked on Sat, 19 May 2007

First, you must answer a question of mine! What's your favorite planet? Mine's the sun. Always has been. I like it cause it's like the king of planets.

And when that thing burns out, we're all going to be dead.


Hey, the question doesn't show up until you answer it. He's screening the questions everyone!
- Jonathan asked on Wed, 16 May 2007

ZOMG, the jig is up. You're on to me. I have been thwarted by my older, smarter brother!

I mean... uh... don't listen to him everyone. He's a notorious liar. I do no such thing!


Where does your sense of humor come from? Mom, dad, your brothers?
- Jonathan asked on Wed, 16 May 2007

I'm pretty sure it's Jesus.


You didn't like Pirates of the Caribbean 2? WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA AND PUPPIES AND CHILDREN?
- John asked on Tue, 8 May 2007

Where do I start?

You know what, I'll just skip to the worst part. The plot. They have to go get item X so they can do activity Y so they can get item Z to go do activity Q - it makes for a good plot for a video game. Not for a movie. When a movie has that kind of plot, it's for one reason - they don't have anything of merit and are simply trying to fill time with fluff.

In general, I don't like my movies saturated in fluff.


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